Virtual Schooling 101 for parents and clinicians

Virtual schooling is as tough on parents as it is on children. You may yourself be experiencing the challenges of helping your children with schoolwork while maintaining a full work schedule. Meanwhile, you want to help patient families who are dealing with the same challenges.

"Pediatric providers are getting calls from parents that really are cries for help with home education," said Lisa Hunter Romanelli, PhD, CEO of The REACH Institute. "They say, "My kid won't do her homework, won't go to sleep, won't go outside." They wonder whether the dosage of the child's medication for ADHD or anxiety should be increased.

"What they're really saying is, 'I don't know how to be my children's teacher.'"

Few caregivers are equipped to manage their children's learning. Helping children of different ages whose schools have different virtual structures and expectations adds to the difficulty. So does working with children who have diagnosed learning disabilities or mental health issues. Then there's the stress that everyone, child and adult, is experiencing in response to COVID-19. It's no wonder caregivers are struggling!

As a child or family healthcare provider, how can you help?

The first step, Lisa said, is simply to acknowledge the challenges. "Parents feel like they're failing at all of their tasks. They need to hear that what they're trying to do is really hard and everyone struggles. Tell them they're doing OK."

In our free webinar on April 20, REACH faculty members Molly Scharf, MD, a family physician, and Mike Scharf, MD, a psychiatrist, shared four steps caregivers can take to help the whole family manage isolation and virtual schooling (from material developed by Mike's colleague at the University of Rochester, Linda Alpert Gillis, PhD).

To help their children deal with their unprecedented situation, caregivers can:

Establish and maintain routines to replace the structure usually provided by school. Keep regular bedtimes and mealtimes. Set a schedule for school work, exercise, play, and screen time. Mike recommended pairing (rewarding) behavior a child likes less, such as homework, with a preferred activity, such as screen time with friends. But don't be rigid! As much as possible, fit the schedule to the needs of each individual and of the family. Adjust as needed when you see what works and what doesn't.
Be emotionally available and foster social bonds. Everyone needs a safe space where they can express their feelings. For younger children, caregivers can provide that listening ear. To provide this support, you have to put aside your own worries so you can be present for your child. For teens, emotional support is likely to come from friends or trusted nonparental adults. Make sure everyone has time to connect by phone or video with people they care about.
Model and encourage healthy coping skills. Caregivers can, for example, show kids how to "talk back" to their worries: "I'm scared, but I'm doing [fill in the blank] to deal with the thing that frightens me. I can do this." Mindfulness practices and exercise are other great health promotion and protective strategies.
Provide age-appropriate information. Limit exposure to virus-related news for all family members. Be prepared to talk with young people about what they see and to explain concepts like "virus" and "ventilators" in words young children can understand. Listen to their concerns. Emphasize that, although this is a scary time, we are coping, and we will get through this together.

Another tip for dealing with education at home is to get help from the school. Parents who feel that their children are getting too much homework or that they themselves need support can take their concerns to the principal or teacher. "You don't have to set it up as an adversarial thing," noted Molly. "The schools and teachers are just figuring this out, too. They may be thrilled to have feedback."

Resources

The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry offers an extensive Coronavirus/COVID-19 Resource Library with materials for families and clinicians, as well as information about telepsychiatry and advocacy.

Phone hotlines are available to help families cope.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255
National Parent Helpline: 855-427-2736 (Monday through Friday, 10 am to 7 pm Pacific)
NAMI HelpLine (National Association on Mental Illness): 800-950-6264 (Monday through Friday, 10 am to 6 pm Eastern)

NPR offers this comic titled How to Turn Your Home Into a School Without Losing Your Sanity. The tone is light, but the advice is spot-on.

Details: Last Updated: June 4, 2020; April 14, 2020; |; Author: Lisa Hunter-Romanelli